For years now, I've envied the bigger busted members of my family. I was always wanting a bigger bust since I had relatively small breasts compared to the rest of my family (I've always been a C cup, where most of the women in my family are D's or DD's). Also my breasts have never been super sensitive, in fact I rarely felt anything at all. So in the past I would also wish I had some kind of feeling in my boobs. Looking back now I should have been careful of what I wished for.
When I got pregnant everyone told me my breasts were going to change. The first thing I noticed was how sore they were, not only did I have feeling in my boobs but they hurt on top of it! Then came the swelling, or as my husband calls it "The remarkable gift from God!". He says my boobs are so excited about finally getting to fulfill their purpose, which of course makes him excited too ;P.
Now for some background information, I was hit in the chest with a soccer ball when I was eight. Now I've never been sure if that contributed anything but I've always had one breasts noticably larger then the other one. Hence why I call my boobs Itsy (the bigger one) and Bitsy (the smaller one). So I knew there was something weird happening when Bitsy started overflowing my bras. Relatively soon after that I noticed that none of my bras (even the bigger ones that my mother had given me from when she cleaned out her chest of drawers) didn't fit me anymore.
Yesterday, Ali and I went to Target on a mission to find bras for me. With trepidation and fear I grabbed the DD cup size and took it into dressing room. All the while thinking, "there's no way I could have swelled up two cup sizes; surely I would only be at a D cup now". HA! Boy was I wrong. Not only was I a perfect DD cup now, but both Itsy and Bitsy fit snuggly and comfortably in their new cup size. So with disbelief and a vague sense of nausea I bought 3 bras in my new cup size. Ali of course said "That's what you get for envying my DD boobs." She was right of course, you should always be careful what you wish for.
Now you may ask yourself, why is this so traumatic for me? Why is having bigger boobs such a problem? Most women pay thousands of dollars to go up 2 cup sizes! Well the reason is that I don't know how to work these new boobies, and I can't quite get the depth perception working. With how clumsy and forgetful I'm becoming it's not uncommon for me to reach for my bra strap to hike it up or to try and scratch an itch and unintentionally punch myself in the boob (I've done it twice this morning already); which really hurts because they are so sore these days, but wouldn't be pleasant at any stage really.
So in closing, I know my husband is thrilled and may a little obsessed with my new boobies, but it is causing me some logistical problems. I should always keep in mind to be careful of what I wish for and to just be happy with who I am.
Monday, April 26, 2010
Friday, April 16, 2010
Baby dream 04/16/2010
The dreams are starting to pick up again and last night was another interesting one.
The entire team from my work was in this dream. We were in a large room that had blue shag carpeting on the floors and the walls. We were all sitting indian style in a circle in this room, just talking and chatting with each other and it seemed like we were all waiting for something. Also a few of them were smoking, so I was over by the window leaning out for some fresh air. Pretty soon the door opened and my supervisor Jason gestured for me to follow him into the other room.
In the other room was a large fire pit and a chaise lounge where another supervisor was lounging, and there was another co-worker from another team standing by the fire pit. Jason then walked up to a large glass desk where there were a few piles of papers stacked on it. Jason handed the other co-worker one of the packets of paper and the co-worker handed him a bundle of cash, in my head it looked like $20,000 give or take, and then the co worker left. Jason tossed the bundle of cash to the other supervisor on the chaise, who put the bundle into a large bag that held even more cash.
When I questioned Jason about it. He said that it was the payments for the reports that he ran on Licensing. He also stated that if I wanted in on the action that I could just run a few reports and he would give me a share, and then handed me $10,000 as a signing bonus. Which was when I woke up and needed to use the restroom.
The entire team from my work was in this dream. We were in a large room that had blue shag carpeting on the floors and the walls. We were all sitting indian style in a circle in this room, just talking and chatting with each other and it seemed like we were all waiting for something. Also a few of them were smoking, so I was over by the window leaning out for some fresh air. Pretty soon the door opened and my supervisor Jason gestured for me to follow him into the other room.
In the other room was a large fire pit and a chaise lounge where another supervisor was lounging, and there was another co-worker from another team standing by the fire pit. Jason then walked up to a large glass desk where there were a few piles of papers stacked on it. Jason handed the other co-worker one of the packets of paper and the co-worker handed him a bundle of cash, in my head it looked like $20,000 give or take, and then the co worker left. Jason tossed the bundle of cash to the other supervisor on the chaise, who put the bundle into a large bag that held even more cash.
When I questioned Jason about it. He said that it was the payments for the reports that he ran on Licensing. He also stated that if I wanted in on the action that I could just run a few reports and he would give me a share, and then handed me $10,000 as a signing bonus. Which was when I woke up and needed to use the restroom.
Baby dream 04/15/2010
Last night I dreamt that I was back in Santa Fe, though in a different apartment than I'd ever lived in before. From the looks of the place I had just moved in, since everything was still in boxes and there was nothing on the walls. A friend of mine was there, but I couldn't tell which friend.
Suddenly the front door opened and my grandmother walked in. I was excited to see her and gave her a hug. She came and sat down at my old (we're talking back in 1999) dining room table. That was when it hit me, and I asked my grandmother "Aren't you supposed to be dead?" (Grandma died back in 2000) She just shrugged her shoulder's as though it were no big deal.
So I got dressed, since I was planning on going out, and I left the apartment. In the next scene I was riding in the car with my mother who was driving me to this party I was going to. We pulled up and started doing circles in the deserted parking lot while she and I talked. We were outside of what looked to be an old warehouse structure. My friend Amy was walking around the outside of the building to meet me with a margarita in her hand. I remember being miffed that she was drinking in front of me since I was pregnant and couldn't drink.
I told my mom while still in the car "Guess who I saw tonight? Grandma came over to my place. Isn't she supposed to be dead?" Again, mom just shrugged her shoulders as though it was no big deal that my grandmother had showed up at my new apartment. After that I woke up and needed to use the restroom, cause that's what we pregnant women do =D.
On a side note, it was great to see my grandmother again, even if she was only in a dream. I've missed her so much since she passed away, and I know she would be exstatic that I have another Cleveland baby on the way. So Grandma, wherever you are, I love you and I miss you.
Suddenly the front door opened and my grandmother walked in. I was excited to see her and gave her a hug. She came and sat down at my old (we're talking back in 1999) dining room table. That was when it hit me, and I asked my grandmother "Aren't you supposed to be dead?" (Grandma died back in 2000) She just shrugged her shoulder's as though it were no big deal.
So I got dressed, since I was planning on going out, and I left the apartment. In the next scene I was riding in the car with my mother who was driving me to this party I was going to. We pulled up and started doing circles in the deserted parking lot while she and I talked. We were outside of what looked to be an old warehouse structure. My friend Amy was walking around the outside of the building to meet me with a margarita in her hand. I remember being miffed that she was drinking in front of me since I was pregnant and couldn't drink.
I told my mom while still in the car "Guess who I saw tonight? Grandma came over to my place. Isn't she supposed to be dead?" Again, mom just shrugged her shoulders as though it was no big deal that my grandmother had showed up at my new apartment. After that I woke up and needed to use the restroom, cause that's what we pregnant women do =D.
On a side note, it was great to see my grandmother again, even if she was only in a dream. I've missed her so much since she passed away, and I know she would be exstatic that I have another Cleveland baby on the way. So Grandma, wherever you are, I love you and I miss you.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Peanut and the Prune
So on Tuesday we had our first OB/ GYN appointment and got to see a pciture of the peanut. We saw a little heartbeat fluttering even. The Dr. was nice enough, though I'm not too happy with the nurse, so we'll see how that one goes. Doctor said to push fluids and not gain too much weight, but I was doing everything I could for the constipation and hemmorhoids so keep that up.
That night I went to the Hilde girls rehearsal. The women had such a great energy and I loved sitting there and hearing all that beautiful music, all the while knowing the peanut was in my belly. Once the group finished rehearsing they gave some notes and the ladies called me up and sang one of their beautiful songs to my belly. It made my mother cry and they called her up too and sang to all three of us. It was very moving and special, and I felt so connected to my little peanut in that moment.
Today, I've had my first prune! Which was not bad....I think the stigma of eating a prune got to me more than anything else. I'm wondering how many I have to eat before I'll be regular again. Although I haven't been feeling bad recently, occaisional sickly times etc., but overall I feel fine. We'll see how that prune works on me though =D.
That night I went to the Hilde girls rehearsal. The women had such a great energy and I loved sitting there and hearing all that beautiful music, all the while knowing the peanut was in my belly. Once the group finished rehearsing they gave some notes and the ladies called me up and sang one of their beautiful songs to my belly. It made my mother cry and they called her up too and sang to all three of us. It was very moving and special, and I felt so connected to my little peanut in that moment.
Today, I've had my first prune! Which was not bad....I think the stigma of eating a prune got to me more than anything else. I'm wondering how many I have to eat before I'll be regular again. Although I haven't been feeling bad recently, occaisional sickly times etc., but overall I feel fine. We'll see how that prune works on me though =D.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Morning Sickness Ensues
So hopefuly this morning will be the first and last time I have actual morning sickness. I had eaten breakfast at 8:30 in the morning and after that started having some heartburn pangs and burpies. Then around 10:15 it hit me, and I had to run to the bathroom, almost knocked this poor lady in the face with the bathroom door, but made it to the toilet in time.
Afterwards I was completely tired and felt drained. My team mate that sits across from me (Mari) got me a Sprite and some ice, thank god, and I felt better after that. We have our first OBGYN appointment tomorrow, so we'll see what she says about everything. Keep your fingers crossed
Afterwards I was completely tired and felt drained. My team mate that sits across from me (Mari) got me a Sprite and some ice, thank god, and I felt better after that. We have our first OBGYN appointment tomorrow, so we'll see what she says about everything. Keep your fingers crossed
Friday, April 2, 2010
Baby Dream 04/02/2010
I'm five weeks pregnant today, though the due date calculators and doctors all are saying I'm 7 - 8 weeks. They're going off my last menstrual cycle, I'm going off the date we conceived.
My dreams have been getting weirder and stranger for about a week and a half now. This last one was particularly funny, so I wanted to share it. Uncle Tim, suggested that I put all these dreams into a blog for the baby to read later on when they're older to see what he/she caused
Here's my dream from last night - I was on a beach and looked down, for some reason I was not wearing anything up top, so I had a clear view of my breasts and I noticed something that was almost the size of another nipple, but it looked like a zit. So I tried to pop it and I was successful, but once I got everything out my boobs blew up to like huge balloon size. By that time I had gotten in the water and I was using my boobs as a floatation device. So just imagine me paddling across some water using my breasts like a kick board. As I started paddling across the water that was when I woke up and had to desperately go to the restroom.
My dreams have been getting weirder and stranger for about a week and a half now. This last one was particularly funny, so I wanted to share it. Uncle Tim, suggested that I put all these dreams into a blog for the baby to read later on when they're older to see what he/she caused
Here's my dream from last night - I was on a beach and looked down, for some reason I was not wearing anything up top, so I had a clear view of my breasts and I noticed something that was almost the size of another nipple, but it looked like a zit. So I tried to pop it and I was successful, but once I got everything out my boobs blew up to like huge balloon size. By that time I had gotten in the water and I was using my boobs as a floatation device. So just imagine me paddling across some water using my breasts like a kick board. As I started paddling across the water that was when I woke up and had to desperately go to the restroom.
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